You're eating that?

Today, uncle, aunts and sis came to the hospital to visit mom. I was in the cafe, they decided to join there, and asked me to get them coffee. I asked them how many cakes they wanted with it, they said two.

A thin pretty-ish young woman had sat right in front of where I had to come and sit. At first I sat there drinking, then I changed my seat cause I felt uncomfortable. She was having tea/coffee and a pastry.

So I was enjoying my tea, and generally talking, taking small sips from my tea, and "eating" it, and taking small bites from the sponge cake, and "drinking" it. When my Uncle says in Pushto "Look at their size, and look at the cake their eating" — I felt embarrassed, hurt and sad. And said, Okay Shakeel bhai, if you say so, I won't eat it. And I pushed the cake towards other people, to show I had withdrawn, with a smile.

But he wasn't talking me. He was talking about that girl. He meant, look how unhealthy her diet is, and how fit she looks.

But I took it upon myself.

Why? I am thinking about this more and more, ever since I discovered why I eat a lot. I have what they call Emotional Eating or Stress Eating. And there's a lot of symptoms associated with it, one them is negative body image and an embarrassment of eating. A person feels shame, when he/she eats. And to curb this negative emotion, a person eats (more).

Add to that the friends and family who wants to 'help' the individual, and 'motivate' him/her by shaming him, threatening him, embarrassing him, taunting him, making fun, and emotionally blackmailing.

The road to Hell is paved with good intentions.

Some of my officers are tasked with losing 3 kg/month for the next 5 months and inshallah they will lose 15 kg! After setting up the target, I gave them a game plan.
Even though you don't work for me :(, still you can lose weight. Here are 7 simple steps:

1. Reduce your intake of food. Follow the Sunnah of the Prophet (sas), one third food, one third water and one third empty.
2. Reduce carbs and increase proteins.
3. No food after 7:00 pm. If you miss the deadline then you are only allowed a glass of hot milk. I told my team to relax as, I assured them, they will not die of hunger.
4. Maintain regularity of three meals a day with a heavy breakfast.
5. Fasting twice a week as per Sunnah, Monday and Thursday.
6. 45 minutes of brisk walk a day.
7. If required, GM diet once a month (it is a wonderful diet spread over one week where you will lose from 2-5 kg in a week. I lost 3 kg when I tried it. You can google it)

It is that simple. Imagine the health benefits of losing those killer pounds and the freshness, alertness and beauty that comes with being fit!
Try it and let me know the results!
P.S. You don't have to work for Timelenders, Asnan Associates, Savdo Enterprises, Markhor Enterprises, Khanasaz builders and constructors, E-Reality Solutions or ITLenders to be able to lose weight :)

Suleman Ahmer's facebook

source: http://www.economist.com/styleguide/introduction

Long paragraphs, like long sentences, can confuse the reader. “The paragraph”, according to Fowler, “is essentially a unit of thought, not of length; it must be homogeneous in subject matter and sequential in treatment.” One-sentence paragraphs should be used only occasionally.

Clear thinking is the key to clear writing. “A scrupulous writer”, observed Orwell, “in every sentence that he writes will ask himself at least four questions, thus: What am I trying to say? What words will express it? What image or idiom will make it clearer? Is this image fresh enough to have an effect? And he will probably ask himself two more: Could I put it more shortly? Have I said anything that is avoidably ugly?”

Message/Words/Idioms/Freshness

Want Clear Thinking? Relax

source: http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/want-clear-thinking-relax/

Dozing or being lazy for those 20 minutes is not the answer, however, in part because these states dull one's mental edge. Active relaxation relieves stress better yet keeps the mind primed.

The best active relaxation is a short mental vacation. Find a comfortable sitting position and close your eyes. Breathe calmly and regularly. In your mind, picture a particularly relaxing moment. Choose any scene you want, such as a quiet afternoon walk on a beach. During this imagined trip, think of as many sensations as possible—feel the soft sand between your toes, smell the salty air, hear the surf, enjoy the warmth of the sun on your face.

With only a modicum of practice, you will find that these “mental movies” can quickly lead to moments of deep relaxation.

To make your mental movies most effective, when you close your eyes think of a phrase to initiate the exercise each time, such as “I'm now going on vacation.” Then focus all your attention on your breathing. When you begin to breathe in and out, fully expand and contract your lungs: inhale slowly for six seconds, hold the air for three seconds and exhale for six seconds. To help control your breathing, imagine there is a candle in front of you; you are not trying to blow it out but simply to make the flame flicker. Do this exercise a second time and take note of the letting go you begin to feel.

If you can repeat this cycle numerous times, your epinephrine levels will subside and feelings of stress and anxiety should taper off. Then you can really enjoy your mental vacation, whether you are at the beach or on a mountaintop. When you want to end the exercise, be sure to return to your surroundings as gently as possible. Try mildly contracting all your body muscles while slowly opening your eyes.

Younger children may find such guided relaxation too restrictive. Instead of focusing on breathing, it may be easier for them to think of “quiet time.” Renowned Italian educator Maria Montessori discovered that most children love the quiet (which may seem unbelievable to many stressed-out parents) and respond well to the following instruction: “Close your eyes. Be completely quiet. Don't move. Hear the silence and listen to your body.” And if young people find it difficult at first to develop a soothing mental image like a beach, read them a story, and they will readily transport themselves to an imaginary world, which is the real goal.

If a child has great difficulty keeping still and silent, calm background music can provide an ideal bridge. The same applies to adults who have trouble relaxing. Listen to melodic, instrumental music, allowing your thoughts to flow freely. For a short break at the workplace, imagining such music is enough—close your eyes and turn on your mental CD player.

Review: Qasd us Sabeel

Qasd us Sabeel by Ashraf Ali Thanvi
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

As the name suggests, the book speaks to a person who has made up his mind of travelling the path of Islamic sprituality and has decided to do tawbah. He or she does not think the rules of Shariat are below them, or that, they're impossible to follow. They have agreed to follow them all.

The book first introduces Islamic Spirtuality, and followed by some insightful lessons. Depending on the reader's experience and knowledge, they can be obvious or, pose much depth and require delibration. The last third of the book is mainly advice in the way of "Do this, not this".

It's not a motivational book for all Muslims. It's not a defense of Spirtuality arguing to convince people of it's validity and virtues. It's not a book of knowledge where one may learn the lessons of Quran or Hadees. This is a compact book which shuns away the misconceptions that become the reason for people not wanting to follow this path, or not treading the path successfully.

Not only is it an important book, it's one that should be read again and again.

View all my reviews

“The life of every man is a diary in which he means
to write one story, and writes another; and his hum-
blest hour is when he compares the volume as it is
with what he vowed to make it.”
—J.M. Barrie

“Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate,
and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction,
and many there be which go in thereat: Because
strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which lead-
eth unto life, and few there be that fi nd it.”

—Matthew 7:13-14