Voices in your head

Here’s the key: Be strategic and intentional about who (the author was talking about the voices in our head, Joey, the one that's too hard on us, and Vicky, that's emphatic and reassuring) you listen to, especially if the voices are inside your head. Those can be the sneakiest. It’s pretty easy to call Joey a jerk and ignore him; it’s much harder to dismiss the voice in your head because, well, it’s you.

Try this tactic: when you hear the voices, give them names and personalities. Imagine a Joey on one side, a Vicky on the other.

The summary. Hear the voice which helps you Improve. Not the one which makes you feel comfortable. Be it the comfort of misery, or the comfort of reassurance.

source: https://hbr.org/2015/04/managing-the-critical-voices-inside-your-head